no work, no play. bedtime at 2 in the afternoon with that book I wanted to read (even if it's disappointing) but for the sweetness in my arms, my birdy, and my lover so close... there is no room for us now and this is disturbing. parent, pet, work, life. why the challenge of leading it, not letting it lead us. i want to close my eyes, not to escape but to be conscious in a mindful way. i want to wrap my arms around my lover and say, how did you ever come to me? how was this possible? i want to wrap my arms around my mother and say, I give up. I want to give her relief, give her a way out.